BRAS AND OTHER TIT-BITS.

The man in my life actually decided to have an argument with me today about the buying of bras.  As if he'd know anything.  I am now sixty-one, a baby boomer and one of the women who threw away their bras in the seventies.  I didn't do this to make a statement.  I did it because I couldn't find one that fitted or was comfortable.

A Camisole Bra

Sometime in the eighties I succumbed to what was called a cami-bra (camisole bra).  This was a delicious little lacy thing with no under-wiring and no hooks.  It could just be pulled on over the head.  You may have gathered that I am not overly well endowed.  But neither am I underlie endowed.  I have to say that at my age my breasts can stand up for themselves.  This is a wonderful gene I share with my mother.  She was a bigger woman all round than I and wore bras with under-wiring.  I realise that many women must wear these more uncomfortable bras to lift the mass of their breasts.  I'm fortunate in that I don't have to and it is women like me who are less catered for by the lingerie shops.

It seems that if you have 12B breasts your back is of an exact breadth so the hooks meet comfortably without you having to expel your lungs of all air.
For some reason I find that if the breasts fit in the cups, the girth of the bra doesn't accommodate my back and I am left fighting for air.

The pretty and supportive Under-wire bra.  A pity it's torture for some of us.

As a five year old when I accompanied my mother into the toilet in a department store I was fascinated when she would take down her panties and wee even though wearing another undergarment.  I strained my neck to see how she could do this.  She was wearing an item that was de-rigeur for women in those days: a girdle with suspenders attached for stockings.  This surrounded the hips but did not go beneath, however, at five, I couldn't quite get my head around it, literally, to see how it worked.

When I was at high school some clever person came up with pantihose.  I was addicted to the US magazine "Seventeen" and had anticipated this invention for six months before they arrived in Australia sometime in the mid-sixties.  Good-bye suspenders.  So long girdles.  Freedom, of sorts, had arrived.  If only bras had undergone such a revolution.

            From this                                                               To this

Cotton suspenders and stockings

My high school bra was of cotton.  I have the peculiar, it seems, problem of being wide set.  That is my breasts do not lie close together in the middle so a cleavage doesn't form.  Cotton bras were not designed for such a mutation but assumed all breasts were made the same.

The result of this was that my nipples and where they were meant to be to fill the bra did not coincide.  This meant puckering of the seam where the breasts did not fill them.  I also spent my day retrieving the straps from my arms and placing them on my shoulders.  This remains a problem today.  Four years ago, as I drive for a living, I decided to confront the buying of bras again.  There was just some jiggling as I drove and I thought I should support my girls so they wouldn't droop.

In spite of the advances in materials I find bras to still be a curse upon womankind.  I blame Madonna for a lot of this.  Just when some clever person had designed the cami-bra, along came Madonna, of the dubious morals, and had Jean Paul Gaultier design a costume for her.

Madonna in Jean Paul Gaultier corset

A corset from the 1950's

The outfit was reminiscent of a full corset of the 1950's.  There was no stretch material in sight and plenty of seams and under-wire.  The cami-bra went the way of the dinosaurs and under-wiring came back with a vengeance.

Patti Page in the Fifties and the effect Gaultier's bra would have under a sweater.

Surprisingly some twenty years later, it persists as do lace and hooks.
A bra should be able to be worn under any clothing of any colour.  Now ideally, this just doesn't work but some of us try.  I buy flesh coloured, which goes under anything.  Black just doesn't go under white, nor does red, pink or purple.

My mother was an absolute stickler for bra straps not showing.  She had keepers in all her garments to stop the straps straying.

When celebrities make a fashion statement of showing their bra straps it doesn't bode well for good grooming.

Today I have seen women wearing dresses and tops with halters or cut away sleeves and their bra straps are on show as if trophies.  These also usually don't match the colour of the clothing they lie beneath   I find this an affront to my upbringing.  I may not have agreed with my mother's taste in clothes but you couldn't argue with her about grooming.  When she lived in a nursing home she wouldn't let her carers dress her in anything that didn't colour coordinate.  Now that's style!

But back to the beastly bra.  My man said: "What is wrong with you?  There are billions of women on the planet and you seem to be the only one who can't find a bra that fits in a shop."

I admit to being amazed that he thought he was an expert and decidedly argumentative to boot.  If you are a determined female who knows exactly what she wants, the range of bras to suit you in a shop is minimal.  I'm not the only one.  Breasts are like snowflakes.  There isn't, or aren't, in this case, two the same, on different women, that is.

A store can only keep a certain number of bras and if you are inclined to despise under-wiring, you are in the minority.  You will have to look in the Sports bra selection or the teen section.  The teen section, much like teen breasts, is small.  It also displays bras of ridiculous, lacy and mis-matching colours.

I finally went on-line and found something quite acceptable but still my man ranted.  "Surely you could have found it in a shop".  I told him I had tried and that I would be happy to show him the Bra section of any department store.  He declined.

I would like to say that I don't give him grief over what underdaks he chooses.  I simply wouldn't know what it is like to house a penis comfortably, or to the left or right.  One thing that can be said of the male appendage - there is usually (mutants not included) only one of them and it is placed smack in the centre.  If there were two and they varied from near to centre or further from centre, you can bet the buying of underpants would become a chore just as much as is the buying of bras.

The whale-boned corset.  What women did for beauty in 1899.

Yes, perhaps I am odd.  Perhaps years of going bra-less have spoiled me.  There have been much worse undergarments for women such as the whale-boned corset.  But women, themselves, are to blame.  What in heaven's name makes them willing to undergo torture in the undergarment department?  This wasn't a male directive but came from women themselves.  I don't think I am like most women because I won't suffer clothes that fight me.  We have enough to contend with in this world without being at war with our undies

The end.

How To Have a Dinner Party

A Dinner Party Held Too Late

1. Invite People.

Four people for a dinner party means just you, your partner and another couple or two singles.  You do a lot of work to prepare the dinner and they may get ill, forget or come up with a last minute excuse such as 'a funeral interstate for which they must fly out'.

Six people is a good number.  Six people fit around a table well and if two decide to drop out, the others will probably turn up unless you have become suddenly infamous in the media and no one wants to know you.

It's very important to match people. You just know when they are too disparate to be able to converse for the evening if you know them well enough.  Disparate people mixing is for large, poolside barbeques where each guest can pick and choose other people or just hold their breath and hide underwater.

If you are new to dinner parties eight people is ambitious.  Your table must be comfortably able to accommodate them otherwise you'll have to resort to fork food and sit around the living room.  This isn't ideal for conversation and is difficult to manage drinks and plates.

Ten or more is not a sit down dinner party unless you are the Queen or have two tables and split the party and the guests.

2. Starting time.

It's so elegant to say for 8pm but make sure it's a Saturday night.  If it's a weeknight, the people who have jobs will be tired.  If it's Sunday they'll want to be up early on Monday morning.

I've had grown men fall asleep at the dinner table.  They remained upright but didn't contribute much to the conversation.

My husband and I had one couple over for dinner quite often.  The man would leave on the dot of 8.30pm.  His wife would stay and my husband would drive her home.  My husband ran off with her in the end, really.  I think it was a set up by her husband.  It turned out he had wanted a divorce for years but they had agreed to stay together until their son was old enough.  Don't fall for this one.  What comes together, leaves together.

3. Starters.

Just drinks and nibbles like nuts and chips.  They have come for dinner.  If you want to stuff them full of hors d'oeuvres hold a cocktail party starting at 5pm and ending at 7pm.  I live with a Polish man and the Poles will invite you for dinner and spend three hours filling you with soup, egg dishes, pierazki (pronounced: piroshki), and cold meats.  Some time later you are expected to consume a three course meal.  I'm not familiar with their culture so in this post, I'll stick to my Anglo Saxon upbringing.

4. Dinner starting time.

If your guests are asked to arrive around 7pm the entree should appear no later than 8pm then have a short break before the main.  Don't leave your guests waiting until 10pm to eat.

5.  Drinks.

Wine is for dinner, not beer.  Spirits and beer are pre-dinner drinks.  Beer is really too filling to go with food.  It's fine at a barbeque but not at a dinner party.  If one of your guests threatens to have a hissy fit because they are not offered beer at dinner, give it to them.  You're not a dictator after all.  Soft drinks, water or juice for teetotalers.

Guests often bring wine so ask if they want it opened and also tell them what you have.  Unless they are wine connoisseurs don't be too fussy.  Large wine glasses are for red wine, smaller ones for white.  There is no hard and fast rule as to what to serve with what.  Go with your feelings and offer everyone everything.

6. Entrees.

The French call the main course the Entree.  In the English speaking west it is instead the dish served before the main course.  It is optional of course.  Make it light like a soup or something tasty, small and savoury.

If you like bread rolls, have bread rolls, but they are really for barbeques and will spoil appetites that should be saved for your fabulous cooking.

7. Mains.

For you main whatever takes your fancy but check before your guests arrive for allergies and dislikes.

It is unwise to cook something you haven't cooked before.  Also pre-preparation and food such as a casserole is ideal.  Attempting to cook steak, fish or a roast, especially for more people than you are used to, is a recipe for disaster.  If you do, try serving everything at once while it's hot and you'll find out how hard that is.  Save that exercise for Christmas and see why women and men all over the world hate cooking turkeys and hams.

If it's a roast it's easy to undercook or overcook it.  How many times have I been to dinner parties where I have waited two extra hours to eat because the meat wasn't ready yet?  Plenty.  It sure ruins your appetite.

Steak?  Better make sure you have the best butcher on the planet or your guests may be chewing all evening and besides, how do you cook steak for six people perfectly and serve it on a plate without looking cooked yourself?  Do I really need to tell you?

You can serve vegetables, a salad or both?  Whatever you do to prepare beforehand allows you some time to relax and enjoy your own dinner party.

Don't go all out to impress, just make a darn good meal.  The company and atmosphere as well as the food and drinks are the ingredients for a successful dinner party.

8.Dessert.

Ice Cream is not a dessert on its own and cheddar cheese does not a cheese platter make.  You need at least three cheeses plus some crackers.  The French have cheese before dessert while the English have cheese after dessert.  Of course you don't need to have either or you can have both.

Dessert is where you can have fun.  The sweetness will also eat up some of the alcohol your guests have consumed.  It's always good to finish with coffee or tea as these just seem to round the dinner out.

The appearance of coffee and tea also indicates that the evening is winding up.  If you are all having a ball, move on to more coffee and tea.  If not, people will eventually yawn, look at their watches and find an excuse to go.

9. Do not wash up.

Stack dishes in the kitchen between courses.  Do not even rinse.  Your guests are not there to hear your labours.  Few houses now have separate dining rooms.  You can serve, you can clear but your role is as the host or hostess, not sweaty workhorse.  You are there to steer the conversation if it falters.  You can get your partner to refresh the drinks but you can't do everything.

When I first went to my future in-laws place for dinner, my fiancee's mother would get up from the table and wash the dishes leaving the men to talk as soon as dinner was finished.  Yes, it was casual but being well brought up I felt it necessary to help her in the kitchen while every fibre of my being rebelled.  It wasn't that the guys had anything interesting to talk about either.  They sure didn't.  It was just this relegation of one sex to the kitchen.  No wonder it took me four years to accept his proposal.

It's funny but rules of etiquette can split nations.  However my credo is simply to make everyone feel relaxed and not as if they have to jump up and help with the dishes.  The dishes will be there in the morning, I guarantee it.

10. Atmosphere.

I have lovely neighbours who occasionally have me over for dinner. Pre-dinner we have a drink in their living room.  Overhead is a round fluorescent light but I just want to get away from it and the glare it creates.

I prefer lamps and some candles if you like.  Candles tend to eat up the oxygen.  I once had to leave an Indian restaurant with fifty tables all lit by candles.  I could barely breathe.
Also don't overdo the fragrant ones.  What you might like may send a guest running and interfere with their taste buds.

11. Do not have a television or radio on before dinner, during dinner or even after dinner.

Nothing is as tacky as a television or radio on in the background during a dinner party.  That's all there is to it. Nein, nyet, non, no.  If someone is missing a vital sports game on the television, you've chosen the wrong night or the wrong friends.  That's right , be a snob.  This isn't a barbeque.  They've come for dinner not to watch a game and if they want to watch the game, they shouldn't have accepted your invitation.

If you have music make it slow, soft, background music or you'll upset someone's digestion.  There's nothing worse than eating to a high tempo piece of music because it revs everyone up and loud music means everyone will have to shout to be heard.

Another good point is not to have a table where the shape makes those sitting next to one another the only ones who can talk to each other.  A table should allow everyone to talk and listen to everyone else.  Long rectangular tables with more than eight people are not for dinner parties.  A round table or small rectangular or square are good.

12. Lingerers.

If a couple look set to stay for the duration there's nothing for it but to give them a large hint or, failing that, tell them politely that you are going to bed.  If that doesn't do it ask them to turn off the lights and lock the doors as they leave.  At Chinese weddings oranges are handed out to indicate it is time for guests to leave and leave they must.  Western society could do well to copy this sensible directive.

END.

CAT ASTROLOGY - Profiling Your Feline By Its Star Sign

 Kitty Minor - the Constellation that cats would like to exist

Dogs are well represented in the stars by having a Constellation named after them – Canis Major, also known as the Dog Star. Cats are very egotistical so imagine how they feel about not having their own Constellation. It might have been called Kitty Minor. The least we can do to help put the matter right is to analyse their personalities by their Star sign.

It’s hardly worth mentioning but if humans conform to their star sign in astrology, so must cats. After all cats have very distinct personalities. While dog’s personalities are partly dictated by their breed, with a cat you don’t know what you are getting whether it’s a moggie or a pedigree.

In this light hearted post I am going to apply astrology to cats. If you know your cat’s birth date, see if it fits. This may seem like purrfect nonsense but if you’ve nothing better to do give it a try. I have had more than a passing interest in Astrology for over thirty years and numerous books on the subject. I’ve applied this research to our feline friends. I will refer to a cat as ‘it’ to cover both of the sexes.

AQUARIUS January 21 to February 18 Air sign

Aquarians make friends very easily although they remain unknowable. They blend into the scenery like the Cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland who undoubtedly was an Aquarian. Its friends see it the way they wish it to be. What could be better? It is like a ‘one size fits all’ outfit. It barely needs to speak. Its friends just imagine what they would like it to say and it seems to say it.

Nobody is better suited to be everyone’s friend. It may fade into the background but its smile remains and leaves everyone it meets with a warm glow. Its friends remember its achievements as they wish. It is a magician who does nothing and everything.

Don’t be surprised if your Aquarian cat loves everyone as much as it loves you. It can be friends with a dog, a rabbit or whatever it likes. Aquarians are tolerant and won’t judge. They won’t even understand if you ask them to make a judgement. They simply don’t understand where you’re coming from. They are notoriously hard to get to commit. Your cat may roam the neighbourhood treating everyone as if they are its best friend. Don’t be jealous, it’s just its nature.

Aquarius is an Air sign and that’s one reason it’s hard to get a grip on their character.

PISCES February 19 to March 20 Water sign

A Fish is the Emblem of the Pisces Cat

Any cat worth the title loves fish, living or dead. The only thing that saves a fish from the paws of this pussy is water although Pisces is a water sign but Cats don’t like being in water.

Nonetheless this sign makes them a bit wishy-washy although unique. Pisces are normally gentle and friendly creatures and that is something uncharacteristic of cats who can also be hunters and killers.

The Pisces cat’s eyes may be set slightly farther apart than normal and it will move with a fluidity that is suggestive of water. While all cats move fluidly this one seems to flow in and out of rooms. Be careful not to slip on it when it lies on the floor as it will be the same as stepping into a puddle of water.

Pisces is the twelfth sign of the Zodiac. Aries is the first and are considered to be young souls and Pisces are the old souls. As such the idea of reincarnation is incorporated into Astrology. Creatures start as new souls and live through many lives until they are old and wise. A soul won’t progress from one star sign to the next until they have passed the tests placed upon it by the nature given to it under that sign. Pisces are kind, intuitive, friendly and self-sacrificing. Their one drawback is that they can be weak willed. This is possibly their Zen attitude to life of ‘live and let live’. What else would you expect from an old soul?

ARIES March 21 to April 20 Fire sign

 

Aries cat - faster than a speeding bullet

 

Was that a bullet or your cat who just ran past? You may not even catch a glimpse of this Speedy Gonzalez and if a fly screen door gets in its way you won’t hear meowing, you’ll hear shredding. An Aries cat has energy to burn and your furniture is a prime target too. Keep this cat’s claws well-trimmed if you are able catch it or you’ll end up like the fly screen.

This cat is always on the go and must have something to do. It may get into trouble because, if it gets bored, it will seek new forms of distraction and venture too far and get lost. This is the cat who will get stuck up a tree or in a drain and need rescuing because it just couldn’t help itself.

Buy one of those cat tube tunnels with lots of tubes at different angles so it can go exploring inside the house instead of the neighbourhood. Cat towers are also a great idea and the more interesting you make it the better. Even cover an opening occasionally with fly wire just so it has the satisfaction of clawing its way in.

Aries cats also have quick tempers and may not tolerate being annoyed by children. It will probably have a fiery look about it or yellow eyes as Aries is a fire sign that goes with its fiery personality. It won’t be a tubby tabby because it burns too much energy.
The only time you may get to pat this lovable cat is when it’s asleep in your lap, exhausted. You are, after all, soft and warm and even an Aries can appreciate comfort when it finally lies down.

A cat tower is a good idea for your Aries cat 

TAURUS April 21 to May 21 Earth sign

A Taurus cat always knows the time
 

This cat is placid and reliable. It likes a very stable home environment and can be very possessive. It is also a tad inflexible. With these things in mind I’d give it toys, a bowl and cushion with its name embroidered on it. Of course we know cats can’t read but it’ll understand intuitively that it is its mark, especially if you label everything it owns.

It won’t like change and that means in its surroundings or routine. It believes it owns the house and that you are its pet. If it is on the kitchen bench and you try to take it off, it’ll object or, if you succeed, just jump back up again. It is, after all, its bench and you must be trained to understand this.

In fact it’ll spend a lot of time retraining you until you get things right. You’d better have consistent meal times and love-up times. It may not be able to read a watch but rest assured it knows the time. Cats are born knowing the time but a Taurean keeps track of it.
Taurus is associated with the bull. Just in case your cat shares some of this animals other attributes, I’d keep it away from the china. Also make sure its bowl is metal or unbreakable.

GEMINI May 22 to June 21 Air sign

 

Siamese cats from Lady and the Tramp

Here is the two sided cat as Gemini is the sign of the twins. It may have different coloured eyes, one blue and one brown or green and patches of different coloured fur. Remember the Siamese cats in the “Lady and the Tramp” movie? They make a great symbol for Gemini cats.

The Gemini cat will never be able to make up its mind with which toy to play or what to do next. It jumps from one thing to another. It’s not that it’s bored, it just can’t make up its mind. Basically it is indecisive. Geminis are both versatile and inconsistent. They won’t stick at anything for too long. They have a real need to communicate and cats, not being able to talk, will try to do this in other ways. They may sit on your computer keyboard and block the screen or meow incessantly and give you meaningful looks. Just talk to it and pat it a lot and hope that satisfies it for a while.

The Gemini cat will also tend to be nervy and tense on occasions. You know the type. They’ll stand on your sofa, arch their back and pluck at the fabric one paw at a time as if walking in an environment without gravity as if they have Velcro shoes. This is one cat for whom a scratch pole is mandatory.

This cat will be sweet one minute but the next watch out. One day it will eat tuna, the next it won’t. It has a split personality so you might like to give it a double name like Puss-Puss or Tiger Tim. It won’t need a companion because it is its own best friend.

CANCER June 22 to July 22 Water sign

 

Garfield - the poster Cancerian cat

You’d better keep a big store of cat food because the Cancerian cat loves to eat. If you don’t give it food it will sulk. It will also prowl the neighbourhood begging for food and pretending it is a stray or lost. Given its girth the people who feed it must be easily fooled. Either that or very old people with bad eyesight.

This cat may actually appear to frown but it’s just the rolls of fat on its forehead. Don’t try to put Pudge on a diet or it’ll just go around to all the neighbours begging for food and give you a bad name. Cancer is ruled by the moon and people with this sign have round faces. Cancerian cats do too but it’s just because their cheeks are chubby.

Another problem the Cancerian cat is that tends to be clingy. Cancer is represented by the crab which sure can cling on when it wants too. You may find you can’t take a step forward because it is trying to wind itself around your ankles and wants a love-up. I say winding loosely in the case of a Cancerian cat considering its girth makes that difficult. Your cat will probably just lean heavily against your legs or plop itself on your feet. It makes a great pal in winter for added warmth.

LEO July 23 to August 23 Fire sign

Goldfinger's cat - a Leo cat likes an owner with prestige

 

The prince of cats because this sign is named for the king of cats, the Lion, and is closely related but a tad smaller. You’d better treat it like a prince but first you’ll have to find out which end is which because it’s covered in so much fur. This cat thinks it is a lion and its mane is likely to be as big. It’ll have a loud meow because it believes it is roaring.

The Leo cat loves to hunt and also to sleep after eating just like its cousin the lion. You wouldn’t keep a lion in your house but if you were smaller than your puss it would amount to the same thing. You would be viable prey so don’t kid yourself that this cat is so cute and cuddly that it would never hurt you. The only advantage you have over your Leo cat is your size and it has the good manners and sense to recognise that fact.

Apart from secretly wishing to eat you they are warm and affectionate with big hearts. They do have a superiority complex and the more prestige you have the better your cat will like it. Nonetheless you will still have prestige in its eyes because you love and care for it. It is nothing if not generous with its heart of a lion.

VIRGO August 24 to September 22 Earth sign

Cleanliness is next to Catliness for Virgo cats

Virgo cats are clean and demand perfection. They preen themselves meticulously and will expect you to have a perfectly clean house. I doubt if it would mind if you used it to sweep the floor except it would make it dirty. You won’t find this cat clawing your furniture although it might rearrange the cushions when you’re not looking.

All cats love hiding in wardrobes but don’t be surprised if this one colour co-ordinates your clothes while it’s in there. It’s hyper critical too and if you find a garment on the floor that you were sure had been hanging up throw it out. Your cat has decided it’s not for you or just plain shabby.

Oh dear, you caught me rearranging your clothes again

They can get bogged down in small details so don’t give it a ball of wool or twine to unravel or it will likely try to wind it back up. If it can’t it will just keep on trying until you are forced to have an almighty tug of war with your cat to take it away. Throw the twine out where it can’t see it or it will go looking and get it back. You’ll never make that mistake again will you?

 

 

LIBRA September 23 to October 23 Air sign

The Scales of Justice are the symbol of this sign and Librans need to weigh up everything. Give this cat a choice of food, say two bowls, or it will just sit there and stare at the single bowl as if it’s been cheated. It may not even hunt for mice as it just doesn’t seem fair. Live and let live.

Librans can’t stand loneliness. More than any other star sign it must be in a relationship to be happy. This means with you. Be prepared to be the centre of its Universe or it will have to find someone who is devoted to it. If it is alone it will sulk and, being a cat, will take it out on the furniture or whatever takes its fancy. Take the hint if it shreds a photo of you in a frame on your mantelpiece. It needs companionship at all times. Having another cat is a good idea so it is never alone.
Librans like harmony but also tend to be overly critical as they forget to judge themselves first.

It can be prickly and carry a grudge in spite of never wanting to take sides. When it’s aimed at it, it becomes personal and it will sulk. It will also seem a relaxed, if not lazy cat as it is, by nature, easy going. This Libran cat is not like your Taurus time keeper. Time has no meaning for it and it may even ask for dinner at lunch time. Librans like bright flowers around the house and these will cheer it up.

SCORPIO October 24 to November 22 Water sign

 

If Pepe le Pew wasn't a skunk, he'd be the poster boy for Scorpio cats

Firstly have it spayed whether it’s male or female. If your cat is a male you don’t want the neighbourhood breeder of pedigree Persians, or whatever, landing at your door with a basket of kittens, lumping it in your hands and crying “Your cat has spoiled my Precious forever”. They will then turn and leave, sobbing loudly so every other person in the neighbourhood knows of your cat’s promiscuity.

Some of them may secretly snicker because they can’t stand the cat person, but others will give you withering looks when you are out shopping.

If Pepe le Pew wasn’t a skunk he’d be the poster boy for Scorpio cats. But your cat is both a lover and a fighter and it will claw its way into the affections of its intended through a multitude of meeker moggies. If he comes home with tufts of fur missing, scratches and a smile on his face you’ll know what he’s been up to.

These cats are jealous of your affection so don’t display too much to your other pets, or even family, in front of it. If you must then make a big fuss over him too or he’ll go somewhere and brood or worse, mount a surprise attack on the other object of your affections or one of their possessions when your back is turned.

SAGITTARIUS November 23 to December 21 Fire sign

 

Puss in Boots - a happy, adventurous optimistic cat

the epitome of a Sagittarius cat

If you see a cat standing on a roof watching birds and hoping one will land or get close enough so it can catch it, it’s a Sagittarian. This cat is an optimist, a charmer and loves life and, in spite of often being foolhardy and taking chances, always lands on its feet. It may end up a little sore and sorry but it will always try again.

Sagittarians are nature’s nomads and love their freedom so make sure your cat doesn’t wander but find it a safe place where it has lots of room and variety. Human Sagittarians have a gift of the gab. Your cat can’t talk but it will say everything with its eyes. This cat will have a pet project whether it is chasing mice, watching over your baby or watching the pendulum of a grandfather clock swing. Its one flaw is that it is inclined to be foolhardy and take risks by overestimating its own abilities.

Just let this cat follow its innocent heart but make sure when you leave the house be sure to look up first and check for falling cats. It just thought it might be able to reach that bird.

CAPRICORN December 22 to January 20 Earth sign

 

Her Majesty the Capricorn cat

If Leo is the prince of cats then Capricorn is the king or queen. At least they think so but they’re probably right. Capricorns are always right. No, really, they’re smart as whips but not egotistical about it. In fact, deep down they lack self-confidence.

Because of this it’s wise to give them lots of positive input such as “Who’s a clever cat then?” and “You’re the most beautiful cat in the whole world”. Yes, we know cats can’t understand every word but they get the intonation.

You will have to serve your Capricorn cat, if it allows you to. It won’t come to you. It sees you as its servant in spite of its deep seated insecurity. Make sure it has an ornate and expensive cushion or bed. If it doesn’t like it, it will simply go and lie on the pillow on your bed to express its disgust.

The Capricorn cat can sit or lie perfectly still. The mountain goat is the symbol of this sign. It likes high places, is a climber and a bit of a loner. Your cat has a regal air and is not inclined to move just for the sake of it. That is because it is perched like a mountain goat, not on a rock, but up high on its expectations and standards. When it has decided what it wants to do it can move with alacrity but will do so with refined elegance.

Capricorn people will only buy the best even if it means saving for a long time to get it. Your cat will also expect the best even if you have to make sacrifices. After all it would if it were you, so what’s the problem? A little work never hurt anyone. If you present your Capricorn cat with something second rate, food or otherwise, it is likely to look at you as if you have crawled out of a hole. It will then turn around, put its tail up vertically to give you a view of its rear and walk off in a huff.

Capricorns don’t mean to be difficult. They just have standards and expect you to as well.

Dedication

Ally cat

 

This post is dedicated to Ally, my grandcat, the cat of my son. When I lived with them for a year, Ally would sit on my computer keyboard in front of the screen to get my attention. When a new cat came into the family Ally took herself downstairs and lay on top of the water heater all day. She was a dear, gentle girl and I loved her. She passed away some years later from old age with the gentle assistance of my Veterinarian son when she was too ill to go on.

I don’t know Ally’s birth date but she was gentle, a loner and affectionate. She may well have been a Pisces.

G.O.T. to watch GAME OF THRONES

Shakespeare Would Have Watched "Game of Thrones" if he were alive today.

It's not often a scene from a television series sucks the air out of you.  Twice now "Game of Thrones" has done that to me.  That's just never happened before and it makes me glad to be living in the time this series is being made.  Gosh, if they'd waited thirty more years, I'd probably be dead.

I had long given up hope of good television.  In the seventies there were some exceptional series made by the BBC such as "The Six Wives of Henry the Eighth", "Jenny, Lady Randolph Churchill", "The Duchess of Duke Street" and others.  They were high quality and riveting series of six to eight episodes and all based on historic characters.  Then, suddenly, they disappeared over thirty years ago.  Just like that, Poof.  None of them come close, however, to the impact of "Game of Thrones".

There have been good shows and sitcoms amongst the dearth since those series in the seventies; jewels even.  However, I sensed the end of television as entertainment was nigh when 'reality' shows reared their vapid heads well over ten years ago.  At first these were touted as 'infomercials', a commercial turned documentary without the guts.

"Game of Thrones" has been made for television and may well be the saviour of the medium.  It comes from the US yet many of the actors are British.  This was a brilliant choice as there was, after all, no US in Medieval times in which the series is set, even if this is a fantasy one.  The effect is to give the series that added zing of class and realism, which comes with a series the BBC might produce.  Some of the actors are good looking, some are not, but all faces have been chosen to fit character.  Young, middle aged and aged characters all play and look their parts.

I first heard of "Game of Thrones" when reading the news magazine "The Monthly" for the very first time in 2013.  The journalist in the 'Film' section was raving about it and how the lead character, Edard Stark, played by Sean Bean, is beheaded.  She admitted to having a bit of a thing for Bean and she wasn't expecting him, as a main character, to be executed at the end of the first season.

Well I had to watch after that, didn't I?  I was hooked from the moment the program started  for a number of reasons.  I love period dramas and realistic costumes.  I am a Media graduate who never found work in the industry but I studied film for five years.  Not that I had to in order to appreciate the visual spectacle and sumptuousness of this production.

The introduction to each episode begins with incredible mechanical miniatures that grow to represent each of the seven kingdoms and their position on the map of a mythical continent called Westeros.  Whoever is responsible for these is a genius.  Who could not watch after such an introduction?

The series is set in a mythical Medieval past and the lighting is done so as to reproduce a time of dark interiors, candle and torch light.  The lighting for exterior scenes appears entirely natural and yet filters have been used to capture the cold and stark landscapes of the Northern Kingdoms.  In the sun drenched South there are lush gardens and Roman porticos.  The landscapes range from snow covered, frozen vistas to dark mountainous regions and moors to sunny Mediterranean climes.  The costumes are amazing and made of cloth suitable to the time.  The skins and furs look real and the sets are both lavish and realistic.

The story is multi-faceted and each episode deals with events in each kingdom so that we may jump from the cold North to the South or jump the sea to a land of sand and Byzantine palaces.  In each series there are a number of lead characters as well as numerous lesser ones.  These change as time goes on and characters are killed off.  In the beginning the head of Northfell is Ned Stark and his wife Catelyn and the Stark's adult and younger children.  The children remain integral to the series as it continues.

There is the King Robert Baratheon, his wife Cersei Lannister, her incestuous brother, Jaime, and her son Joffrey.  It is obvious to the viewers that the vile Joffrey is actually the son of the brother and sister.  The other characters are the blonde exiles Daenerys Targarin and her brother, Vyseris, who wish to win back their throne.  There are the men of 'the Wall' and to top it off the rarely seen Wildlings, a race of living dead.

As the series progresses more characters are introduced.  Some start as minor characters whose roles grow, making the complex tapestry of the plot even richer.  The incestuous Lannisters have a powerful father, Tywin Lannister, played by Charles Dance who makes my mouth water at the best of times.  His other child is the real centrepiece of the show, Tyrion Lannister, a dwarf of formidable brain, loathed by one and all but his mistress for his deformity.

Peter Dinklage, who plays him, is the actor who has left me reeling with his scenes.  I believe I am not alone.  He is brilliant.  No one wants his character to die and I have a feeling he won't as I believe a dream he speaks of suggests a premonition that he will one day be the King.  The dream is about beetles and an idiot cousin, but I can tell a good premonition when I see one.

Another character, Jon Snow, is the bastard son of Edard Stark.  He is sent to 'the Wall' but eventually becomes a leader.  His younger sister and brother in the meantime are having adventures of their own.  The younger brother early on, catches Cersei and her brother in flagrante delecto and is tossed from a tower with no memory of what happened and paralysed.  His sister, who wants to be a warrior, ends up alone after her father's death and abducted by reprobrate who plans to sell her off.  They begin to form a strange alliance on their journey and this is another sub plot.  The middle sister, Sansa, becomes a major character and is meant to be married to the horrid Joffrey but, when he chooses another bride, is instead later married to Tyrion Lannister, the dwarf, for whom she cares not at all.

She is rescued after Tyrion is accused of Joffrey's murder by Petyr Baelis, the Machiavellian character of the series.  He, no doubt, has plans to make her Queen of his own kingdom when he finds one.  He is an incredibly polished devious man who represents the higher public servants of the world everywhere.  He schemes and manipulates right down to telling whores how to do their job.

In fact there are many sub plots and major plots but they are beginning to come together.  Nonetheless they are often glued by grisly deaths.  Lesser characters in the series all have complexity and add considerable weight to an extraordinary plot.  Each scene is meticulously put together from the costumes, the fabulous sets and lighting to create mood and ambience.  Never in my mind has there been a more perfect show.  I doubt there ever will be again.

Did I mention there are dragons?  Daenerys is also known as Kaleeshi, 'the mother of dragons' and these, the wolves of Northfell and the Wildlings make up the only supernatural parts of the show.  None is overdone so the sense of realism prevails. 

Am I raving?  Those of you who watch it know I'm not.  Those who don't watch it have the pleasure of discovering that I'm not.

It is like a modern version of Shakespeare, but his Globe Theatre is the Media and the best artisans of their time are his producers and actors.  If he were alive today he would be glued to his television set and waiting for the next episode.  In this show I'm sure he would have felt he had found his peers.

I salute the author of the books on which the series is based, George R.R. Martin.  Perhaps his double, middle initials give a hint to the fact that he likes to make things complex.  Whatever the reason I am in awe of him.

I also salute two masters of film making in David Benioff and D.B. Weiss.  The latest issue of Vanity Fair calls this show the best television series ever made.  That is high praise from the highly respected News Journal.  However it is its fans all over the world that prove that quality still wins over crass.  In the sit-com "The Big Bang Theory", which I confess to liking immensely, even Sheldon has something to say about it.  "How good is "Game of Thrones"," he enthuses.  From this shows producers, through him, comes high praise.

It is almost sad to watch the best television you are ever likely to see.  At the same time it would be worse if it had not come about.  What it shows is that the media is still capable of reaching beyond it's last best to further better itself.  It is an analogy to the human race.  We are always capable of going one better and to grow.  It is heartening to know.

I had been beginning to feel that technology was marking the end of the evolution of the human race but perhaps I am wrong.  We are still  progressing.  There is not much new technology in "Game of Thrones" in respect to special effects.  It is simply the marriage of great talent with television.  In the game of life, it seems, the human mind is still capable of originality.  That gives me hope when I had begun to think humans were running out of initiative in the face of massive technological revolution.

Long may our minds reign supreme above technology.  In my 'game of thrones' I fear the day technology is incorporated in the human minds.  Technology is there for us to use and must be kept in its place.  The greatest power of all rests with us and our minds and of what they are capable.  They are our greatest kingdom.

END

MANNERS

The Absence of Manners

 

 'Manners' is a most misunderstood concept.  It is not the same as 'etiquette', which is culturally accepted modes of behaviour such as laying a knife to the right of a plate and a fork to the left.

In some cultures it is considered good etiquette to belch after a meal to show satisfaction.  Thank goodness it isn't in Western Society, not that it stops some people.  Blowing your nose at the table is also anathema to me.

'Manners' arise from a person's natural empathy to treat others the way they would wish to be treated in the same situation.  In other words it is consideration for others.  For instance when two people arrive at a door at the same time the well-mannered will hesitate and offer to let the other go first.  If both are well-mannered, as we have all witnessed at some stage, a negotiation must then take place:  "You first."  "No, after you." "Oh, thank you."

If one is not well-mannered he or she will have simply barged ahead and cause the other to feel aggrieved.  If both are not well-mannered there is bound to be a collision.  Some people feel it is a sign of weakness to show manners.  If, in fact, a person is always conceding the way to ill-mannered persons, they are likely to appear to be weak by the ill-mannered and will themselves feel used.

Good manners isn't about letting a woman proceed before a man.  I hesitate for a man or a woman and men hesitate for other men if they are being considerate.  One thing all the men in my life have in common is a tendency to walk ahead of me.  If I ask them to slow down and walk with me, they all tell me the same thing: they are paving the way.  I believe it is the male seeing himself as protector syndrome.  The hunter within him is checking ahead for danger.  The trouble is that doesn't wash now but they all still seem to do it.

Well barging ahead is not the worst thing in the world after all.  The only remedy is holding their hand or putting them on a leash.  I've had Labrador dogs in the past who, when you put them on a leash drag you behind them in their desire to rush ahead.  It is their natural exuberance.  I figure it's the same with men and, as exuberance is a great characteristic, why tie him down?

It can be a tough call in life to keep your manners in the presence of those who have none.  Quite often people from certain backgrounds are brought up not to consider others because it is felt that manners display eagerness to please and it will make them appear weak and will get them nowhere in life.  When they run across those who do show consideration they are likely to misjudge them as being weak.  They will often try to take advantage of such people only to discover they do actually possess a backbone.

I have often been at the receiving end of this kind of behaviour.  It has been interesting to note than when the person discovers they have misjudged me as a walkover, they seem really puzzled.  They then keep trying to abuse my good nature because they can't take it in that their judgement was off.  To be frank, it is very annoying.

It would be great if everybody had the same codes of behaviour.  By 'behaviour' I am including 'etiquette' along with 'manners' as they often work in harmony.  If two strangers meet and each have similar manners, it smooths the way for them to discover more about one another at a personal level, rather than to have to reach common ground first because they are each confused by the other's behaviour at their first meeting.  No wonder there are wars and we need diplomacy between countries with different social mores.  Behaviour varies from place to place.  To Westerners some Eastern and Middle Eastern countries seem to show less empathy than we do to things we consider absolutely sacred.

We would never eat a dog for instance or cage a bear.  Unfortunately there are those who think that animals have no feelings.  Yes, that is ignorance but if you are brought up from childhood to believe that and your nourishment depends on it, we can't judge them by our standards.  We eat other animals of course but, apparently, they are killed in a humane fashion, whatever that is.

I remember walking through a market in Hong Kong selling fresh fish and live frogs.  The frogs were flapping around the floor in pairs each with one leg tied to the other's leg.  I couldn't get out of there fast enough.  I also couldn't protest.  The sellers would simply have laughed and not understood my horror.   I considered this cruel but they obviously did not.

I still feel bad about eating meat.  Not only that, we eat herbivores that don't exactly hunt us to eat us.  In some countries animals have their throats cut in a ritual killing.  No matter how much I try to tolerate other cultures, I find it difficult to understand why those doing this never consider how it would feel.  It is simply gross.

I'm getting away from manners, but then again, manners are about tolerance and keeping the peace between groups and individuals.  If someone shows you lack of consideration, think how your blood boils.  Mine does.

It's interesting that a lack of manners on the road can lead to the extreme behaviour of road rage.  There is something anonymous about a steel capsule.  We vent rage upon the driver in a way we won't do face to face.  Of course driving is about life and death.  It's not like giving way at a door.  Not giving way on the road can cause death and so manners, or in this case, considerate road behaviour, become the most important type of manners of all.

Treat others as you would have them treat you and consider their right to life.  The whole principal of Christianity is this and that is basically what manners are.  They are to acknowledge another person's presence and to respect it.

END..

A BEACH TOO FAR

A Dumper

 

Water turns me on, not in a sexual sense but in a making me feel alive sense.  As soon as I see it my spirits lift in a way that a landscape can't affect me.  I don't know if it's because I grew up near Sydney's Northern beaches and, from my home, had a beautiful view of Pittwater, an inlet of the Hawkesbury River.  Whatever the reason, I am never quite complete without a water-scape to fill my senses.

The view of Pittwater from Church Point

Australia is surrounded by water, which makes it an island, but there is so much interior that living near the water, or with a view of it, is both sought after and expensive.  Of course a person could buy a cheaper property overlooking water on some barren southern cliff but, in general, the most sought after water views are near cities or coastal towns.

There are plenty of barren and inhospitable beaches on an island continent whose mainland circumference measures almost thirty thousand kilometres.  This measurement does not include Tasmania or the many islands that make up Australian territory.

One thing they all have in common are sharks.  Of course there are sharks in every ocean save, I believe, the Mediterranean, which has smaller, mostly harmless sharks. Nonetheless in Australia few people are taken per year and this is because most know where and where not to swim. When I say few, I mean at least ten to twelve, and to those poor souls the statistics are meaningless.

My parents taught me that swimming inside the breaker line meant that you were less likely to be taken by a shark.  Sadly I'm shortsighted and every large cluster of seaweed was mistaken for a Kim-eating shark.  To this day, though, I have all my limbs.  Waves disturbed me almost as much as sharks.  Australian children learn how to be 'dumped'.  How often did I emerge from the water with a crotch full of sand?  Plenty.

It's quite embarrassing having your swimsuit hanging between you thighs laden with wet sand.  You try to extricate it hiding your lower half under the water but its not easy.  Chances are another wave will come along and force you face first in the water.  It's all part of growing up at the beach but it doesn't seem to happen as much when you grow older.  In my case it's simply because I hate getting my hair wet and having to wash it afterwards.

My first experience of the surf was of being walked towards a breaker on the shoulders of my not very tall father as he jovially assured me he would let no harm come to me.  The approaching wave was taller than both of us put together and I quickly formulated that it would break over the top of us.  I freaked out and now can't remember the outcome

This lovely, fatherly attempt to help initiate me to surf has stayed with me all these years and had the opposite long term effect to giving me confidence.  Bless his heart though for trying.  Nonetheless I was soon confronting waves and have since done my share of diving under a curler to avoid a dumping.

There's nothing like the thrill and terror of seeing a dumper, a wave that curls from the top and begins to form a cylinder within.  There is but one thing to do and that is dive and hit the sand, lay flat and wait for it to thunder down, over and past you.  Often however, if big enough, it will pick you up from the bottom and take you with it, rolling you around like a dead fish so that you don't know which way is up when it starts to subside and you can try and surface for air.

Describing this scene is like reliving it all over again.  You never forget the experience but you will still return to the sea as if the primeval part of your brain draws you there to better, simpler times that are hidden deep inside your brain's inner cortex.

When I see an expanse of blue water it is as if my soul, which has gone into hibernation from the sheer repetition of the everyday, wakes up and thinks heaven is in sight to release it from its physical confines.  It really does feel like that.  Something deep within me stirs and feels the hope and possibilities I am missing these days.

While I love the beach, not all are equal.  In its vast circumference Australia has only a small percentage of really good swimming beaches.  Some of the reasons for this are the quality of the sand and water but for others, no matter how perfect the swimming possibilities, you only venture in at your peril.

Above the Tropic of Capricorn exist crocodiles and, in the summer, deadly Box jellyfish.  The stings of this creature are so painful they are likely to kill you before the venom.  Those few who have survived them have the scars to show for it.  The long, stinger covered tendrils leave dark, permanent welts all along the lines where they have touched the skin.

Scars left by the tentacles stingers of the Box jellyfish

Box Jellyfish

The islands of the Great Barrier Reef are where people swim, scuba and snorkel and are supposedly free of stingers.  This is because the jellyfish breed in river estuaries and remain close to shore.

Sea snakes don't seem to kill anyone even though they are capable of it.  They are a gentler variety than their land based cousins and don't attack.  Another danger in the ocean is the Manta Ray with its venomous tail spike but this is only a defense mechanism.  The only death I have ever heard of from one of these gentle giants is the tragic one of Steve Irwin.  The great environmentalist and exuberant, infectious character was killed by one.  It was almost a fitting end for the great man as a warrior for nature to be speared in the heart.  I almost see the hand of God in his ending.  There was no surer way to ensure his work would never be forgotten and its effects continue long afterwards.

But back to beaches.  I once lived in Melbourne on Port Phillip Bay in a bay side suburb.  The water was still and shallow and I needed shoes to wade into its tepid water.  In my mind it wasn't water at all.  My husband and I went to the coastal beaches near Portsea, the so-called back beaches.  These were not attractive like those in Sydney and look positively dangerous.  We never went back.

A Back Beach of the Mornington Pensinsula south of Melbourne, Australia

I now live in Brisbane which, to my horror, when I arrived, I discovered had no surf beaches.  I was so eager to get out of Perth I didn't care.  The surf beaches lie an hour to the north and to the south.  The southern Gold Coast boasts the most famous beaches in Australia.  I think they are inferior to Sydney's, but they are a tourist haven.  The beaches are long, unbroken by headlands and surrounded by skyscrapers.  People drown there every summer because foreign tourists simply can't read the sea.  It looks tranquil but there are rips, undertows and sandbanks.  The life savers do their absolute best or the numbers would be much higher.

The Gold Coast

Some people prefer the more natural beaches of Noosa and the ones on the sea side of Fraser Island.  Those around Noosa, apart from the one of Noosa town itself that is not a surf beach, are hard to get to without a four wheel drive.

There are also great beaches off Stradbroke Island that lies off Brisbane.  Unfortunately it is a forty minute ferry trip from the mainland and you may need to travel up to an hour to get to the ferry depending on where you live in Brisbane.

When we lived in Perth we were at first excited at the sight of the white sand beaches and surf.  Sitting upon one just before midday one Saturday we saw people begin to vacate the beach and looked at one another puzzled.  Then it happened.  A breeze picked up and became stronger.  The sea became choppy and sand began to pick up.  We left.  We had experienced the famous Fremantle Doctor, the breeze that comes in every afternoon and makes the beach impossible to enjoy.  Our earlier idea of an evening beach barbeque went out the door.

Myself, son Asher and Bruno on a bleak winter's day at City Beach, Perth, WA

In the afternoon the ocean becomes a glassy mirror as the sun begins its journey down to the horizon.  I was very glad not to have a view of this from our house, which was within a kilometer of the beach.  It explained why, up until then, the nineteen eighties, Perth had no really prestige houses with an ocean view north of Cottesloe.  Things changed while we were there, but I wouldn't have paid to look at that hot, silver strip.  The ocean is on the West and facing in that direction in Perth is hot.  The word humidity hasn't made its way to that city yet and never will.  Hot means very hot and dry.  It is also very cold in winter.

My parents moved to Perth against my advice, stayed two years and moved south to the beach holiday town of Dunsborough.  This is where the West's beaches come into their own.  Dunsborough is situated on Geographe Bay.  The bay faces North West and is protected from winds at its Southern tip by Cape Naturaliste.  The sand is white, the water blue and there are no waves.  The water is shallow then deepens gradually.  Sharks don't bother coming in to such warm water without enough depth.  It is absolutely ideal for families and those of us who have been terrorised by big waves.

The gorgeous beach at Dunsborough, WA on Geographe Bay

The only problem here are small and vicious little stingers that come when the water flows from certain directions at swimming times of the year.  They can vary in size annually as well and the sting can range from an irritation to painful as my son discovered one year when he was the first in the water and ran out covered in painful welts.

Further around from Dunsborough come the little cove beaches that are deeper and with some chop.  These are in secluded and protected headlands and grass and trees line the the area down to the sand.  Moving a little further south you come to Margaret River and Yellingup beaches.  These are famous surf spots.  Yellingup is surrounded by a steep hill on which perch the holiday homes of Perth's wealthy.  You can't call it a pretty place but the beach is great.  There is major surf area and a lovely protected lagoon on one side for swimmers.

Lagoon at Yellingup Beach, WA

I am fond of this southern part of Western Australia now that I don't have to live in there.  It's partly because my parent's remaining years together were spent there and partly because it has a lovely atmosphere.  I shall go back as I must to place my mother's ashes with my father's.  His lie in the memorial garden of the church he helped design and build - Our Lady of the Southern Cross.  That's another very good reason I have great fondness for the place.  It really is a little slice of heaven.   

END