We've probably all clicked on a story on an internet news site that's classed as a 'Sponsored Ad' and, then, don't we regret it?
It usually starts with something like: Low cost pain relief the big pharmaceutical companies don't want you to know about', or, 'Anti-ageing formula with secret ingredient used by doctors to the stars'. You know the type of thing, but woe betide you if you open the site because on it, always, is a video you have to watch. It's not just any video, it's one that doesn't have a length bar at the bottom that shows how long it is and that's always a sign that you're in for the HARD SELL.
These videos always have one essential component; the person who makes them is a qualified medical doctor. Not only that, they have appeared on various talk shows, their articles have been published on well known medical internet sites and they rave on and on about the fact at the beginning of their self-aggrandizing talk fests.
I once started to watch one of these. It was by a 'cosmetic surgeon to the stars' whose cream, containing hyaluronic acid in his own special formula, marketed and sold only by his company, was the reason that his celebrity clients looked twenty years younger than the average woman or man without the benefit of surgery. Yeah, right. I only watched it almost to the end because I simply couldn't believe anyone could deliver so much bullshit before actually getting to the point of naming the product or expect someone to continue to watch the promotion all the way to the end.
Perhaps the idea of these videos is to somehow hypnotize viewers into a vegetative state where they are left so bereft of mental acuity that they buy the product at the end of the presentation. I cannot otherwise believe that anyone with a modicum of intelligence would do so after being subjected to such a prolonged insult to their intelligence
One of these presentations that I didn't watch fully to the end concerned a doctor who was looking for a cure for dementia for his wife who, I might add, was at a very advanced stage of the disease. They had tried everything when the doctor began his search for alternatives and, when he find the magic formula, it took only a couple of weeks for her to regain her faculties. The odd thing was that it took him a couple of years to find the cure by which time she would have been dead or well beyond hope. My recollection isn't exact but I do remember there were jarring inaccuracies in his spiel. Of course he, the doctor, then went on to offer his cure on his own marketing platform, on his own site.
The other thing about these promotions is that they always seem to be made by doctors from the USA and their accents, frankly, drive me nuts. Sorry, they just do and I think it's because the USA is the home of the hard sell. In fact the only reason I recently watched a presentation to its end that I clicked on from an advertisement on a news site was because the doctor had an English accent. I suspect, however, that it was a voice over because, when the doctor introduced himself in person on the video the sound was out of sync. He also said his findings were shown on the Mayo clinic site (USA) and in some Phytology journal whose name I can't remember but that was also a US publication.
This particular doctor had patients who suffered pain from arthritis and he specifically brought one of his patients to our attention whose name is Frank. We heard all about Frank who is a veteran with a high pain threshold. We know this due to his suffering from numerous war related injuries. Frank had tried every thing for the pain of his arthritis and we heard about every single one of them. Some had even given him some mild relief but Frank was determined to find relief and happily stumbled upon the doctor who offered him his magic formula that eased his pain.
Firstly it was made abundantly clear that this relief came from a natural 'magic' golden herb found in India although we never actually hear the name of the herb. We were informed that our doctor found out about it when visiting an Indian restaurant and began chatting to the Indian owner who informed him that practically no one in India suffered from joint pain thanks to this herb. Meantime we are seeing people on the video picking a herb that looks like coriander. The doctor then warns us that if we buy this herb, whatever it is, from sites like Amazon or places where it has been processed, we will not get the efficacy of his version of it that is organically produced and to which he has added other herbs and whatever to improve its performance. If the Indian gentleman said that it worked fine on Indian people in India why add extras? Well apparently Indian people use so many herbs in their cooking that this naturally adds to its efficacy.
Imagine, a whole nation that didn't need this doctor to improve their magic golden herb, as he refers to it. Of course he has named his improved herbal product with a catchy name and sells it only on his site at the end of the video. Naturally I stopped watching at that point but it did continue although I'm not sure for how long. I only watched for twenty tortuous minutes out of sheer, perverse curiosity to discover how long the doctor possibly thought he could hold our attention.
I then had a thought. Are people who make these promotions, which often are made using YouTube, making money from the number of people viewing the actual video as well as the time it takes them to watch it? I frankly don't care enough to look into this to find out. What is extraordinary is how many doctors use this method to promote their products. Why, I ask, and again, why? Are they counting on people's desperation or their stupidity? Does hammering irrelevant details into viewer's heads before getting to the point make their spiel more credible? I think not. I think it must be an attempt to beat people insensible and into submission.
A few minutes into any of these presentations I am ready to find the particular doctor's email and write to them to tell them how much they have annoyed me and insulted my intelligence. Added to which I would say that, even if the product does what they say it will do, I wouldn't buy it for just those reasons. In fact that's not true, I might buy it if I thought it would work but, not for one moment do I believe any of them have actually come up with a product so good it would do as they say it would. If it did, they wouldn't have to sell it so hard.
I am in my sixties now and have been subjected to advertising since I could think. When I was in my early twenties my husband made a mute button for our television so I didn't have to listen to advertisements. Happily remotes now all have mute buttons. I have to say that, probably, only twice in my life has an advertisement inspired me to go out an buy a product and that was because the product was so new, innovative and interesting that I felt I had to try it.
I am not a follower and am not interested in what others consider to be prestige items. I can see the point of advertising, in fact it keeps free to air television alive these days, but that doesn't mean I have to watch it. I do, however, appreciate clever, innovative and entertaining advertisements but feel that the people that use the hard sell should either be jailed or put in mental institutions because they are public nuisances. They should concentrate on trying to heal their patients and not try salesmanship as a quick fix to making them rich.
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